I’ll admit, I’m WAY outside the “normal” circle of socialization within our society these days. I don’t have kids, don’t live with kids, and don’t hang around with other people’s kids very often.

Now, I’d like to say that I DO like children, I just always knew my role in their lives wouldn’t be in a parental aspect.

Where I DO interact with kids is at the coaching level at a martial arts organization I’ve been involved with for most of my adult life. There, I’ve interacted with children as young as 4 and noticed the striking (er, um karate pun?) difference between the behaviors and conversations of the 4-9 year olds prior to class beginning, and the behaviors and conversations of the 11 and 12+ year olds.

Kids, Before Heavy Socialization Training

I admit, in this social martial arts organization setting, I was always one of the first ones to arrive to class, partially so I could get warmed up properly before we started the workout, but mainly so I could take some time to say hello to the various friends I train with. You know – chat with them and smile a little before we start kicking and punching at each other during class.

During this socialization time, the 4-9 year olds would run up to me after they arrived and put away their shoes, and tell me the MOST HILARIOUS stories about their lives and their views of the world from the past week since seeing me last. I’m sure they didn’t mean for them to be hilarious, but just the same they enjoyed my enjoyment of their stories, and answered all of my playful questions as I teased more joy out of the experience.

But by 11 or 12, the kids were noticably more reserved in their socializations. They tended to form small social groups and no longer mix like they used to as the social butterfly children they once were. They started to look more self-conscious about how they were being perceived, and they started judging others more strongly based on their own perceptions.

Socialization, Or Teenaged Hormones?

People who don’t know about the Law of Attraction will attribute those changes to the chemical changes going on within the kids themselves, deeming these socialization changes as “normal” and “typical teenaged behavior”.

But hey! I remember what happened at that age. I remember the confusing and sometimes horrifying books my parents suddenly thrust upon me (I ultimately appreciated learning the correct information and not just info from my friends), the sudden changes in how I was expected to dress and act both at home and at school, how my friendships all went under the microscope, and the seemingly very sudden onset of paranoia some adults displayed as I went through early adolescence.

I know that all the adults in my world – especially my very very loving parents who took their role seriously and did a very good job with it – were well-meaning, but it makes me wonder about the written accounts of a “normal teenaged behavior”.

It’s my belief that the sudden social changes were probably just as confusing as the physical changes to me at that age, and I wouldn’t be surprised if many other kids face similar social pressures at that age.

I know and respect and appreciate that the changes in social pressure came from a good intention originally, being based upon the desire to allow teenagers to grow up as much as possible before becoming parents. However, its sudden delivery coupled with emotions of great fear and distress definitely have an impact on a developing mind who, until recently, has been joyfully playing and going to school and being encouraged to make friends with boys and girls.

The Socialization Process

Parts of the socialization process include:

• Social Proof (you are judged by the company you keep)
• Intellect (higher intellect is better, low intellect is to be mocked and used)
• Good vs Bad (good behavior should be rewarded. bad behavior should be punished, but the squeaky wheel gets the grease)
• Mating (“my other half”, a single person is not whole past a certain age except for certain windows of time)
• Honesty (the truth shall set you free, anything hidden that gets discovered is amplified to prove it)
• Trust (your word is your bond)
• Respect (respect is earned, so be respectful)

This article about the socialization process has been written as a supporting document for other entries, including parts of my free Law of Attraction-themed email list you can subscribe to over here!

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Related posts:

1. Teens & Good Decisions – Abraham Hicks
2. Abraham Hicks: Teenager’s Snarky Tone
3. Abraham Hicks on Sibling Rivalry (2/2)
4. Abraham Hicks on Sibling Rivalry (1/2)
5. His Misalignment and Your Alignment, Abraham Hicks

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